but when we came back it was a nightmare - my daughter didn't want to go with her "dad" and it was a mess...what can I do?? I'm stuck with this situation for now - I want them to go to a good school and I have them when it counts...he's a good dad he's just a strange introverted person and they like to be around people and friends...sigh....I haven't been sleeping well lately. I stay up too late reading murder books - me and J are going down to MD this weekend on the bike - I need a good ass-kicking Harley ride!

Fractured Tibia or not - we are going to Wildwood. I'll just get Jess a wheelchair - I will in the meantime try to download the picture of the cast that is bigger than she.
Everything is going well - no drugs - no problems - it's that simple.
I could stay like this forever and hope that I do. I cannot believe I wasted so much time on Junk when real life is so much better. I wish I could help those that are in that drug haze; but some are not as fortunate as me and if I had a tragedy or something bad or stressful I can't say that I wouldn't run back to my demons....for now though...everything's sunshine.

We were going to go to Great Wolf lodge in the poconos as it has a waterpark and everything and then - she fell on the swings and has a cast from thigh to toe...I feel so bad for her - I changed everything to Wildwood but what can she do there with that kind of a cast - she is only 5 and has no concept of how long 6 weeks is going to be...here comes one frustrated little girl...

Did everyone have a great fourth??? I did - my son told me that not everyone in the world celebrates it - just us because we are the center of the universe - I had to agree..
I got a whole bunch of fireworks and loved watching my son put each one carefully in a bag and carry it out - studying each one carefully before choosing our next firework - and then my daughter wanting to blow everything up at once. Singing Annie while swinging around her sparklers..she knows that whole score down pat and can sing any of the songs. I don't know anything outside of tomorrow...other than that all is well for now...I had a depression attack but they're getting fewer and farther between.
I feel for my dad who has drowned in a sea of alcohol and the more days that pass being clean the more obvious it is how bitter people become when they use alcohol or drugs to cope with life and how happy people are who don't - not everyone - but as a general rule. My mom is the happiest person I know - or content I should say and she never so much as smoked a cigarette.
This should serve as a warning to any of those who are in it or thinking about it STAY AWAY - plus being in this part of town as opposed to where I was before has helped me tremendously - that other neighborhood was just saturated with the most potent cheapest drugs on the planet and....that's just not a good place to be...I prefer this condo, lying by the poolside every day lifestyle - where my kids can run and play, swim, go into the playground or watch the boats sail across the river - it's beautiful here - I absolutely fell into the heaven I have always dreamed about...I'm not rich by any means - but I have everything I want...and more.

Karma - what goes around comes around - that's all I have to say about some evil twisted person I know that is finally getting what they deserve...happens to the best of them - you can't continually do something wrong to people for years on end and not get paybacks for it in some way. I do believe in Karma no matter what anyone says or thinks - I've seen it in action too many times...

On a good note...we are going to Great Wolf Lodge in Scotrun PA in August - me, J and the kids can't WAIT! It's gonna be a blast  - my mom also bought a house near a beach in an undisclosed location and we will be staying there with J's bro and his new chippi in a few weeks - we got the keys!!! And the alarm code and everything else but it's fucking a lot farther than I thought - almost 3 hours away!  I'm used to Jersey which is sooo close - Ocean City's about an hour from my house and Wildwood another 1/2 after that - but this house is 4 or 5 bedrooms and if my mom is involved I'm sure it's spectacular. What a little money can do...Then in Sept our usual Mickey Mouse trip - that's where J's mom is so we go there and I like Disney World I don't care that everyone knocks it - I'm still a kid and I will keep J a kid as long as I can - with his ex his blood pressure was 210 over 111 at one point and his doctor wouldn't even let him leave the hospital he was soo in danger of a stroke - the other day he went and it was 131 over 80 - his doctor told him someone must be treating him right.

Last night we were watching this show on HBO about a Shapelle Corby from Australia who was traveling to Bali and got caught in customs with 30 pounds of pot in her boogie bag? She said it was planted and all through the show it lead to the fact that eventually she would get out...but the ending...gave me chills - is she innocent or not? Go on wikipedia and decide or see the HBO drama and see for yourself.

And if you're looking for the Destroyer you better get it quick - the ones I have -- because they are going fast - much to my pleasant surprise - IF NOT - ce' la vie' - or however you spell it - don't say I didn't warn you...

Debbie