but I didn't and now it's too late - and I am VERY depressed - my depression is like the ocean - waves come and go ebb and flow - and there's nothing I can do about it now - I feel like every wrong turn I could have made I did all in the name of what? What was I searching for? I got off drugs - that's one good thing - but beyond that everything else I did was one big mistake, except for my kids too and I just want my kids to be happy - I hope my Jess could even make it as a star somehow Jake, he's going to be a straight up business politician but my Jess, she's already swinging those hips like a mother - so I am hoping that she follows her dream early on - not like me - I went to school, got a good job - but am I really where I want to be - for a while I thought I was - but now - I am back to regret and that's the worse feeling of all

I would never make it as a serious blogger - I forget - it's been a month already - I read a few good books - one was about these murders in Waco Texas - Careless Whisper it is called - some say it is told too much from the prosecutor's side - but it's a great book and that David Spence - what a guy - chaining his naked girlfriend to a tree with a dog collar when she was "bad" and then even then when he got the death penalty she was crying - gotta love that - but some say he was executed in 1997 unfairly - I think he did it - it sounds like he did - but the only people to know are the dead three - Raylene Rice, Kenneth Franks and the mistaken identity girl Gayle was the one who was supposed to be killed - I can't remember who they killed instead - her name forsakes me but she was the third victim - it was a "murder for hire" plot that went awry - and the guy that actually concocted this whole scheme - he got away - scot free - Jill - Jill was the name of the third victim - what a shame - just  a bunch of potheads out for a good time and then you get a tree branch shoved up your coochie - I never had that happen in my party days , not under protest LOL - anyway - all is well and I just wanted to write and hope everyone had a good Valentime's Day - I got a make over at Saks - the greatest store - love the Chanel section!!! I got a bunch of makeup and a bracelet with a grand total of 919 and that was with the 10% discount! what can I say - I love that fucking Chanel shit - I think I might win a Gucci purse real cheap if I am lucky and from ebay 130.00 I got my daughter enough clothes to last her til she's 7 - I got my son a lot to but the bitch hasn't sent it yet and isn't answering my emails - paypal to the rescue - gotta love ebay! Talk to ya'
Debbie