Anyway,

1985- total punked out South st kid

1986 - life as I know it today starts....

1987 - the summer boils

1988 - meeting J,H. - a man who would start the beginning of a spiral - of which if it weren't for a few blessings I would call downward, The 1969 awakening of MY life.

1989 - meeting J.M. aka P - starting the so called "career" I'm in now. Starting a VERY VERY BAD TIME

1990 - I have completely eradicated - except for Sept 30th, 1990, an incredible acid trip of a LIFETIME, the entire year was worthless and sucked. BAD.

1991 - PMCO - I can't believe the shit Idid there...

1992 - the end of the year I would meet the man who spurred me to get out of Philly.

1993- starts off with me completely suicidal - middles with me stripping - ends with me on a spiritual path led by the melodic sounds of Masters of Reality - Black Sabbath - one of the best albums ever created. 


"All that I believe now that is gone....

1994 - a worthless year marked by the WORST acid trip I ever had.

1995 - a good solid year.

1996 - a good solid year - but the beginning of opiates. I had never tried them before, believe it or not - it had always been pot and coke.

1997 - H.S. show - moving to
1998 - PA again which sparked off a very strange period of which led into 1999 - where people closest to me did things that opened my eyes to how cruel and unusual life can be.

2000- ready to move to California but - the end of the year finds me pregnant

2001 - one of the best - the year of my son's birth was a blessing and yet started addiction to where I KNEW what the word REALLY meant.

2002 - GVW - I still can't believe what happened happened and I can smell the rain when my blood pressure was so bad I had to run out into the rain, the pouring soaking rain to catch my breath,,,and he fucking died too - they ALL DIED - R.M. 8/14/1971- 3/27/1993  J.H.- 10/28/1956 - 3/12/1992 (death date was close - this could have been the funeral date.) - and then G.W. - 11/19/1958-12/9/2008.

2003 - a nightmare marked by the angel of my daughter's birth - the only good thing to happen all year besides having my son as well.

2004 - meeting MY mr. right - it caught me by surprise.

2005 - the beginning of the end of my love affair ending with H. Also learning about Love, real Love

2006 - this was a pretty good year - fun - fun...

2007 - a job I had for 12 years ends - the end of the year is a nightmare like I've never known.

2008 - a spark of hope

2009 - deep uncertainty, I don't know where this is going. I still at the age of 39 have no idea where I am going but I know that something's coming - I've felt it my whole life - it just hasn't happened yet - but all of the other pieces to the puzzle have fit - it's the final piece - I have everything else.

2010 -  what next?

I can't believe it's been since July since I posted Im in a massive state of depression and want to get REALLY high and just nod out and then get REALLY HIGH again and again and again I just wanna /can't believe dominick dunne died will we get to see the phil spector one???